Schlumpy, Frumpy, Dumpy

cartoon courtesy of nataliedee.com

Eee gads, what a mood!

I'm reading my horoscope this morning and find this further down the page. Holy Crapinoli! No wonder I'm feeling like a lukewarm-mess these past few days!

The Cancerian has many potential faults. They can be untidy, sulky, devious, moody, inclined to self-pity because of an inferiority complex, brood on insults (very often imagined), yet are easily flattered. They can be tactless and difficult yet, because they are normally ambitious, they will curry favor by floating with majority opinions, outlooks and fashions of the day. As a result they often change their opinions and loyalties and, indeed, their occupations, and lack stability. They are easily corrupted and, because they are convincing romanticizers, can make successful confidence tricksters. Their romanticism in another sense make them ardent supporters of causes, for example a football team with whose heroes they can identify in a world of fantasy.

Could I be the John Edwards of my neighborhood?

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Feeling a bit stuck of late.

How do ya'll unstick? How do you negotiate to motivate? How do you do it to be it?

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It Was the Dog

Now I remember why I never eat at White Castle.

Please send your sympathy cards to Pup, George, and Calvin.

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Big-ass Ham - the day after

This is all that's left of it. Way less than I figured since it was the LARGEST big-ass ham I've seen in a while. It was a ham from the little piggy we bought from Pup's pig-raising cousin. Darn good pig!

It was my first ham if you can believe. But I patted it with brown sugar and mustard and poured 7-up over it's scored skin and damn! It cooked up good.
Five of us this year. Lots of Pup's ginormous family were over at one of his sister's houses. I just wanted to be with my kids this year. The enormity of that family is something I'm working on getting used to. I still am having nightmares about Thanksgiving. You know I'm joking.
Here is my yearly attempt at making the bunny cake. I cannot, for the life of me, get that gaddamn boiled frosting to work like my Swedish momma and great-momma could. What part of the baking-genie am I missing? I asked Pup to decorate. He fussed, but liked it when he was done. Ha!

It's okay. We just scraped the frosting off the pan and goobed it on top of our cake. Numm!

Then we hunkered down on the sectional. Boys napping, two of the girls working off hangovers (young uns!), dog outside whining because his Bella was in the house and he wasn't, and me trying to resist the candy on the coffee table while watching a bit of golf.

Awesome day. What did ya 'all do?

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Spring Cleaning

I did a bit yesterday preparing for Sunday's big-ass ham and I was listening to an iPod playlist with my fav dance-around-like-a-spazz choices and I have one word to say.

Audioslave

I hadn't thought about them in a while.

Holy crapinoli, Chris Cornell. You give me a music-boner. Love you!

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Hot Men Friday

Casey James
American Idol

Don't judge. I can't help myself from watching that show. Does it salve any ill will you may be feeling against me if I told you I TiVo this and bloop-bloop my way lickity-split?

This beautiful boy is so not my type. I'm showing diversity yes? Ha!

I have a very inappropriate crush on this guy. It puts me at creeper-level just a little bit. I hate it when I find guys attractive that are my daughter's age. Seems so ick!

I'm just lookin'. No thoughts on pushin'.

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Winter Fashion 2010: “walk like a man, stand like a man, be a man my son!! “ 

If you’re anything like me then the first sign of winter comes as a welcome surprise. Fashion designers and stores are at red alert as summer “sale” signs are popping up all round to make way for the latest winter trends that are about to hit the shelves nation wide.  

Men’s fashion have definitely found its place on the runway and this year is no exception. A mixture of prints, shapes, colors and silhouettes combined in multiple layers is 2010/2011’s look.

Here is my “how to” guide for this years men’s fashion, style and trends:

Scarves a huge plus for every guy’s wardrobe!



  

Scarves have become the “must have” accessory for men in the corporate frontline, it provides the obvious (warmth) but it also allows for a pop of colour or an excuse to wear a flamboyant print with out looking garish.
The days of wearing granny’s scarf are long gone and designer scarves have become the norm, available in every colour, print and style. Dare to be different by wearing a bright print scarf with that drab business suite or to add some colour to your day to day look.


Prints & Colours – every thing goes!




The trend across the board is that colour and prints should be mixed and matched to create an interesting and unique look that suite you’re personality. My suggestion is to limit yourself to 2 prints/colours per outfit, this way you still keep to the current trends and will avoid looking like a clown.

It’s all about the right Shoes!

Shoes for men and women scream personality and reveal a lot about each individual. Winter 2010/2011 is all about his and her boots, Dolce & Gabbana is my choice for men.


Must have shoes for the average Joe:

• Dress-Sneakers: great for an upbeat everyday look, going out and hanging with friends.

• Easy slip-on/vans: perfect while relaxing at home and playing on that day to day look.
• Dress/Formal Shoes: a must have for the office or important events.
(make sure to invest in some quality shoes to make a great impression)


Must have shoes for the Fashion Forward:

•  Gucci Boxing-boots: a great addition to your winter wardrobe.
• Christian Louboutin dress shoes: Christian Louboutin has released a collection of men’s shoes that are nothing short of amazing.
• Men’s Ankle Boots: this is the perfect boot to create an edgy rocker look for guys.


Suit up!

This year’s corporate look has taken a walk on the tailored side, Tom Ford suites are the best option for this season and was the choice at the 2010 Oscars for most leading men. Perfect tailoring combined with exciting prints and fabrics are the new look for men on the move!


A great alternative for a corporate look is to pair your suit with a great Trench Coat; Burberry’s 2010 collection is amazing.


Ready to Wear Look!

Layering is key for 2010’s casual wear; combine your button down shirts with colourful T’s and accessorize with the top 10 accessories for 2010!

Skinny’s and Straight-cut pants are back in style, but bleached and distressed Jeans are out. When buying pants make sure to look for a great fit in a dark blue, dark brown or black single tone colour.


Top 10 Accessories for 2010!

1. Assorted Collection of Scarves & Pashminas.
2. Louis Vuitton Belt.
3. Burberry Aviators.
4. Collection of Leather and Rustic Armbands.
5. A Russian Ushanka (snow cap)
6. Alexander McQueen skull designer keychain/flash drive.
7. Louis Vuitton messenger or men’s Office Bag.
8. Alexander McQueen Wallet.
9. Burberry Umbrella.
10. Tie Pin (preferably vintage or designer)


.........................................................................


2010 is all about seizing the moment and living in the now, make sure your fashion and style reflects the current vibe in
South Africa!

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Pup and His Love

Pup and his car the day after he bought it.

Last night I look over at Pup's dual's (monitors peeps - let's keep it in the pants) and I notice he is reading my blog.

Pup loves me.

But he does not read my blog on a regular basis. Once in a while when I mention something or someone else mentions something I've written it will pique his interest.

He'll jump on and skim read a few posts until the words start swimming in front of his eyes. He isn't much of a reader. I've known him five years and I saw him read a book once - we happened to be on a lovely beach in Ixtapa and he was TOTALLY relaxed.

Don't mistake that for being uninformed.

Pup does most of his readings from the internet. Yes, there are naked ladies thrown in there for good measure (Wha? That's called porn? Oh! I like that stuff.) but the rest is on news sites. He isn't a browser of any blogs or such.

So last night after he has read some in my blog he comes to find me and I say,

"Did you read my blog"?

"Yes."

"Did you like it"?

"Sure babe!"

"You really read it?"

(laughing) "Yes! But I'm not in it enough."

"What?"

"I should be in it more."

"You're in it all the time."

"You have the wrong picture of my car."

(me, blinking)

"You need to put the right picture of my car on your blog. You need to write a post about me."

He is half kidding. But only half.

He stands there laughing and laughing and I start to laugh and I say.

"No - I won't. You can't make me."

"Get over here. You need a spanking."

Ha!

I love that man.

If Pup were to be a guest-blogger, here is the type of story he might tell.

There once was a man from Nantunket . . .

And it would be the dirtiest/funniest story you've ever heard!

Well, at least he would laugh himself sick.

Love you baby.

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Oh Wait! Let me look for that.

It's time to cook a big-ass ham for many of us.

I'm not a huge fan of big-ass ham, but this morning I am digging through all the recipes I've gathered during my 21 years on this earth (ha!!).

I'm not a great cook, but I have been a lover of cooking since I was about 12 I think. I'd sit in my kitchen with my momma, going through her recipe box, and copying down some that appealed to me.

If I remember right, the ones I got from that time were mostly pie, fudge, cookie-type stuff.

Then I started jotting down other recipes from her files. Sadly, I never learned how to make her kick-ass roasts. Just can't duplicate that incredible taste. It's a momma-memory now.

I got my own recipe box (still have it) and started gathering my own recipes. When I was in my 20s and dating my wasband I really developed a love for recipes. Had to cook my way into his heart don't you know. Luckily for me the man would eat ANYTHING and enjoy it.

We had kids and I was a stay at home momma for a few years. Very budget-challenged years. I got incredibly good at dollar-stretching and the recipes grew and grew. Lots of hot dishes (shout out to Minnesota - hell ya!) and meatloaf stuff. Gathered tons of recipes from my momma again.

Had gardens with tomatoes, zucchini, broccoli, beets, green beans, winter squash, carrots, peas. Tons of other crap I can't remember.

Lots of canning. Jeez I used to kinda love canning. My girls will tell you different. That I was a crabby beast during canning days (late nights getting the stuff put up - tomatoes wait for no man or martha).

I sure did enjoy how the finished product looked. All those gorgeous jars full of colorful nummy stuff.

Going through the recipes is memory-loaded. So many of these were written from my momma's own hand and many are ones I dragged out again and again when the girls were babies.


So on Sunday I will bake my big-ass ham, roast my new potatoes, and make a bunny cake with marshmallow frosting. And I'll think about my momma.

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