Embarrassing

I have received the celebrated and coveted Oh My Blog award.

Of course, there are conditions attached. The one that seemed achievable for me is telling an embarrassing tale.

As you may guess, I have many. I have said more than once that "freak magnet" must be sparking off of my aura because that is what I attract. Maybe freak is harsh. Let's call them INTERESTING.

Examples:

• The guy who, out of dozens of cars on the freeway, chose me to drive next to and show me his wiener while he was MASTURBATING! Umm, yeah. I won a prize telling that story on a local radio show.
• The guy who followed me around several tag sales (a street was having a neighborhood collaboration) and at the third sale, sidled up to me while I was checking out a couple of event pompoms stating, "I bet you have a nice cheerleading outfit at home you should try on for me." Aaaah! I won another prize from the same radio station telling that story as well.
• How about the guy that pinched my nipples at a club stating, "Oh! Look how the little rascals like me"!
• And who can forget the guy on a city bus that showed my daughter and I how his shirt pulled on his underarm hairs and how much that bothered him.
• This one isn't that creepy, but I found it interesting because I do believe he was walking to his car after a Promise Keepers rally. He was walking behind me as we walked to our cars (I was going home after work) and as he passed me he whispered in my ear, "I bet your husband is a happy man."

I guess these aren't as embarrassing as they are INTERESTING; to me anyway. :P

I have to say though, that the memory that really sprang into my mind when I thought about the most embarrassing moment is the time I was exiting a city bus.

I had on a summer skirt that wrapped around and fastened in the front with two ties. The skirt was longish and as I stepped down the bus steps, the hem of my skirt brushed on the step above me.

A woman behind me accidentally stepped on my hem and as I walked away my skirt was totally RIPPED OFF OF ME. On a downtown Minneapolis corner. At 8:00 in the morning.

There I stood for a brief second in my pink and white lacies. Oh dear god, I am turning red just remembering this. I grabbed up my skirt, tucked it around me as effectively as I could, and walked with head down quickly quickly to my office.

I was never so happy to get to work and find a safety pin.